» Can you go home again?
The other day, I took a walk through my old neighborhood. I grew up living in a small apartment with my parents and haven’t visited the house in probably over a decade. Both parents are remarried and live elsewhere, so I no longer have any current connections to who might be living in that space. I looked long and hard at it from every available angle. Looking at the things that were different as well as those that had stayed the same. I was flooded with emotions and did a fair amount of journal spilling when I got home again.
Yesterday, I spent the afternoon with a friend I had been in touch with, but hadn’t seen in about 24 years. It was his first time back to the area where he was able to take a long hard look at all that had changed. (Which in 24 years, was a tremendous amount.) He was a little overwhelmed to say the least. The first day after driving around and looking at everything he had to go back to his hotel to lie down… then didn’t want to leave the room come morning.
Having experienced these events almost back to back, I can’t help but think to myself, once you have left, can you ever really go back home again? Even if your homestead still stands and your family still resides there, your time away must have altered your perspective… I mean, if we are older, how can it be the same?
Your thoughts?
Comments
This home thing is a tricky business. I live in the same town I grew up in – 50 years and not once has it felt like home. Eleven years ago I had an opportunity to visit the place in England where my parents are from. When I stepped off the train I could feel my whole person sigh – home. And yet, I’d never been there before. As for the going back – I showed my mum my photos, 40 years after she had left there, and she kept saying “well, it never was like that!” We keep places in our memories as they were, and not just this mythical home. If you visit, say, London, and then don’t visit for 10, 20, 30 years, you will remember it as it was an be stunned to find it changed, even if you know something is going to be different. For instance, I enjoyed lunch in a little restaurant near the British Museum. I know it’s not there any more but I’m sure if I were to go there again I would deplore whatever has happened to the place. Strange creatures, human beings.
Thank you for sharing that Winnie – I’m glad it’s not just me.
I grew up in a small town in ND and go there about once a year or so. I would have to say it is like a touchstone for me to be able to go back and see the many things that haven’t changed, although much has. I’m almost 50 and my parents have been gone for 7 and 11 years, yet I find it soothing and reassuring in some odd way to see people and places I have always known still be there.
Jackie
http://www.lettersandjournals.com
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